Onto a new start....

I have FINALLY finished moving all the old fics from the website to the blog (here).

From now on, all the fics posted will be *NEW*

And also, important notice time:

ANY POST WITH THE TAG "KELSI" IS WRITTEN BY KELSI. IF IT DOES NOT HAVE A "KELSI" TAG, IT WAS WRITTEN BY ME, MARY.

I thought of this idea, to label authors, waaaayyy too late, and I don't feel like going back and re-tagging all of them. Maybe at a later time I will succumb to a spark of motivation, but not right now =)

Type rest of the post here

Click Here to Read More..

Wash Day

Rating: PG for a few typical Bourdain phrases
Author's Notes: It's an acquired taste =P


*Set in an anachronistic past or a retro-cool present (Provincetown, Ma)

Wash Day

It was a wash day and I was in a wash day outfit: a pair of shorts that I’d forgotten to wear, a men’s t-shirt and pale blue bandana. No underwear, because they’d just been washed; I hung the laundry on the clothesline in the backyard. A hot and salty day and I’d left the door open so I could hear the record player from where I stood. Mary and Deacon left earlier to go to breakfast and skulk around town. Dry, chalky dirt mixed with sand caked the soles of my feet. A couple, two young men, walked past the yard: a tawny blonde in jogging shorts and a delicate redhead with blue eyes. They’re having an animated conversation; the blonde gesturing wildly and the redhead laughing heartily and nodding his head ‘yes’. As I watched them, I didn’t notice Tony jump the picket fence and walk into the yard. He parted the curtain of clothes I’d hung up and stood behind me.
“Hello,” he says softly.
I spun on my heel, making a weird snuffling noise in surprise. He grinned down at me.
“Oh. Hi.” I say, grinning up at him.
“Are you busy tonight?” he asked, “I thought maybe we could get something to eat, then see something at the matinee. How’s that sound?”
“That’s sounds great, I think they’re doing a “French New Wave” feature at the cinema.”
“Really? Excellent; very romantic.”
Tony put a cigarette between his lips and started to light it.
“Hey! No.” I barked. “Not right here. You’ll set my clothes on fire.”
Tony put the lighter in his jean pocket, the cigarette still in his mouth.
“I set your panties on fire last night, you didn’t mind then,” I heard his mumble under his breath.
“You’re funny.”
He began to inspect the clothes I’d hung up, occasionally turning to give me a “Really, Kelsi?” look when he came upon a piece he considered dubious; like my Yes t-shirt.
“Oh yeah, this is classy,” he said, taking down a pair of panties I’d bought on clearance at one of the sex shops down the street. Kelly green boy shorts with the words “Lucky You” in white on the front and a shamrock on the back. “I’ve never seen these before.”
“I’m cheating on you.”
He sighed dramatically, “You seem the type. The guys at work told me to say away from girls like you”
We were both quiet for a moment and Genesis’s “Fountains of Salmacis” could be heard clearly from the doorway. Tony rolled his eyes.
“How can you listen to that shit?” he teased, “It’s so pretentious, all that unnecessary keyboard crap, and chords and odd beats. Hermaphrodites? Killer weeds? What the fuck?”
“You know,” I replied, faining disgust, “You come into my yard, smoking, insulting my clothes, insulting my choice of music… I can’t see us sustaining this relationship for much longer.”
“Oh, well, I feel the same way.”
“I guess this is good-bye, then,” I turned away from him and tried not to smile.
“Ok, but before I leave and switch teams for good, I brought you something, that’s why I came here.”
He took my hand in his and with the other he gently, reverently, pressed something into my palm. I stared at the gift, completely surprised. Creamy white, fragile, the size of a peach pit with its lower jaw and teeth still intact: a bat’s skull.
“I found it on the beach” Tony explained, “I don’t know if it somehow managed not to get crushed long enough to bleach or maybe if someone bought it and dropped it, but I saw in the sand this morning... and I thought of you. I thought you would like it.”
He peered into my face, his wide, brown eyes full of boyish earnest.
“Do you like it?”
The skull was warm and slightly moist from being in Tony’s hand for so long. The idea that he had walked from the beach to my yard with this vulnerable piece of bone clasped protectively in his large callused hands made me feel sentimental. It reminded me of something from one of Kipling’s Jungle Book stories, about how a wolf has unbelievably powerful jaws, but could carry an egg in its mouth without breaking it.

“Thank you,” I could feel myself beaming, “its beautiful… it’s so beautiful.”
I leaned foreword and kissed him on the cheek, as he still hadn’t discarded his unlit cigarette. Then, Tony gingerly removed it from his lips and stooped to kiss my mouth.

“I’ll see you later, honey.”

Click Here to Read More..

Heart Full Of Soul Pt. 2

Rating: R for a scene of relatively innapropriate content. Could really get a PG-13, but I'd rather warn you lot than have you read it and get all freaked out.
Author's Notes: Part 2 to the other Yardbirds fanfic.


By the time you got to the first floor, you were snuggled into Jimmy’s vintage colonial jacket, wrapped in his arms, back to front. He rested his chin on your shoulder and occasionally kissed your cheek after ranting on Keith for being drunk.

You also found out that the newest member of the elevator was named Chelsea and from Liverpool, as you guessed. You could hear her in the back talking to Jeff. She was gushing all over him and flirting non stop.

The elevator stopped on the ground floor and you all got out. Jimmy took his head off your shoulder and put his arm around your waist. Jeff appeared on your left, holding hands with Chelsea. You turned towards him as you all walked through the lobby.

“So, I’m guessing yeh fancy ‘er then, eh?”

“Well, yeah,” he said and grinned slyly. “She’s gorgeous, and she’s funny. And she’s a blues obsesser like us, so she’s got to be groovy.”

“Well I’m happy for you,” you said and turned back to Jimmy.

When you got to the front desk, Peter Grant was already there pacing.

“Where the bloody hell were you lot?!” he exclaimed and threw his hands in the air.

While Chris explained everything to Peter, Jimmy turned to face you.

“Wot say we go find somewhere to, erm, hang fer a bit while this gets straightened out?” he asked and ran his hand through your hair.

“Sure,” you said and grinned. Jimmy took your hand and you two sneaked off. Well, you tried to at least.

“Hey! Where the hell do you two think yer going?” Peter yelled to you. “As I’m hearing, there’s a whole corridor teeming with girls looking fer yeh. I thoroughly suggest yeh don’t wander too far from us. We’re trying to find some rooms fer yeh now.” He said. You frowned and walked back to the band with Jimmy.

“Nice try,” Jeff said to you as you walked by. You stuck your tongue out at him and he did the same to you. You were getting closer to Jeff friend-wise as the day went on. He was a fun guy to hang with. Although, you still kept remembering the horror stories of him snapping at people and getting violent. You turned to look at him as he kissed Chelsea, and you couldn’t see him getting that mad at someone. Or maybe that was just the tea talking.

Suddenly, the elevator door opened and the roadies pored out all out of breath and paranoid of every girl that walked by.

“Bloody hell wot ‘appened to you lot?” Jim asked they approached the desk.

“Bloody fan girls and groupies just stormed us as we got out of the lift. Thought we were the band. They’ve gone all potty up there,” one of the roadies explained and looked around nervously.

“Well sir,” the man behind the desk said. “I’ve found you another set of rooms on the very top floor, and those rooms include unlimited access to the rooftop pool.”

“Will we be the only ones who use it?” Emily asked.

“Yes m’am.”

“Then let’s go!” Keith proclaimed and whirled his arm in the air.

You all piled into one elevator while the roadies went into the other. You made sure that the 20 button was pushed and not 10. You leaned up against Jimmy the whole ride and he held your hand. Jeff was in the corner making out with Chelsea while Emily was flirting with a blatantly drunk Keith. This left Chris and Jim without a girlfriend and you kind of felt bad for them. Then again, you assumed they’d find a groupie.

When you got to the top floor, you peeked around the door very carefully. There wasn’t a single soul up there and it felt very refreshing. You and Jimmy took the on the left at the very end of the corridor, facing the street. Jeff and Chelsea took the next one, also facing the street. Across the way from you went Emily and Keith. Jim and Chris each took their own rooms as did the rest of the roadies.

“What a view,” Jimmy said as he put down his carry-on bag and walked over to the balcony doors. You went and joined him, noticing the one queen-sized bed on the way. You gazed through the doors but didn’t dare walk onto the balcony.

“Yeah, very, erm...industrial,” you fumbled. It was horrible. The street below was lined with cars and lit with late-night stores’ neon lights. There was the occasional honk and siren in the distance. And it was filthy. As you two looked out the window, Jimmy coolly reached up and closed the blinds.

“Well, at least it’s night now and we don’t need the extra light,” he said.

“We don’t need any light,” you said coyly and turned to face him. He grinned down at you and you did the same. He ran his fingers through your hair for the hundredth time that day (though you wouldn’t dare complain), but for the first time he kissed you on the lips. You felt electricity run through your every nerve, muscle, and bone of your body. It was like magic, and you couldn’t explain it. Just as it was starting to get intense, it was interrupted by the sound of shouting across the street. Ordinarily, you could have ignored it. But this time, the voice sounded very familiar. You stopped and pulled away from Jimmy.

“What’s wrong, love?” he asked with a hurt expression on his face.

“I think I know that voice,” you said and walked over to the balcony. You opened the blinds and went outside. Across the street was another hotel, smaller obviously and not as expensive. There was a girl standing outside yelling to someone inside about a credit card.

“IT WAS GOOD THIS MORNING!” she yelled. You suddenly realised who it was. Your other best friend, Julie, was born in New York, moved to England in year one, and then moved back to New York after school finished. You hadn’t seen her in YEARS.

“JULIE!!!” you screamed 20 floors down to her. She looked around confused. you yelled her name again and she finally looked up.

“Who the hell are you?” she yelled up to you.

“it’s Lilly! Remember?” you waved down.

“Oh my God!” she yelled to you. You couldn’t blame her for not recognising you, she was only 20 floors below you. By now Jimmy had joined you on the balcony.

“I have two questions for you,” you yelled. “Do you need somewhere to stay, and who’ your favourite Yardbird?”

“Yes and definitely Chris. He’s just dreamy!” she yelled as you turned to Jimmy and he nodded.

“Meet me in the lobby right now,” you said to Julie.

“OK!” she yelled and picked up her bags.

“So we found Chris a bird then,” Jimmy said as he walked you inside.

“Apparently. You go tell him and I’ll go get her. Whether she’s staying with Chris or not, she has a room, right?” you asked.

“No, we only have the entire floor,” he said and grinned. You kissed him again and almost forgot about Julie.

When you got to the lobby, there were a few girls left from the hallway, but none of then recognised you. When you saw Julie she enveloped you in a hug.

“It’s been forever!” she said as you walked back to the elevator.

“I know. Oh my god, two things: Emma’s here and you’re spending the night in Chris Dreja’s room,” you informed her. Apparently, you should have told her one at a time, because she fainted outside the elevator. One of the bellboys saw this and ran over.

“It’s ok, she just fainted, but we need to get to the 20th floor.” You said and he nodded. He picked her up and brought her in the elevator.

When you got to the 20th floor, Jimmy, Emma and Chris were waiting in the hallway. When they all saw Julie fainted they ran over.

“I think I told her too much at once,” you confessed. Jimmy smiled and shook his head.

“I’ll take her,” Chris said gently. You could tell he liked her already. The bellboy placed her in Chris’ arms and you slipped him a tip. The four, or three depending on how you looked at it, walked to Chris’ room and put her on the bed. A few seconds later she woke up and looked around. She sat up slowly and clutched her head.

“I fainted, didn’t I?” she asked.

“Yeah. You didn’t even make it to the elevators!” you said and laughed.

“Emma? Dear god is that you?” she asked and Emma nodded. The two of them hugged and laughed.

“It’s been so long!” Emma said smiling. You and Julie nodded.

“Oh, this is Jimmy Page and this is Chris Dreja, but I’m assuming you already know that,” you said and Jimmy put his arm around your waist.

“Yes, I knew that. I think that’s one of the reasons why I fainted,” she smiled.

“Well, I’m tired and I think I should go watch Keith, even though he’s probably passed out by now,” Emma said and stood up.

“We’ll catch up in the morning,” you said and stood up too.

“Ok. I should probably get settled here too,” Julie said and grinned at Chris. He did the same.

“Wait,” Emma stopped and said. “What are you doing here, in a hotel?”

“House getting fumigated. Cockroaches. Nasty business.” She said and laughed.

“Rightey then,” you said and started to walk out of the room. Everyone waved good night and Jimmy shut the door behind him.

“Good luck with Keith,” Jimmy said as they walked down the corridor.

“Thanks, everyone’s probably gonna get lucky tonight except me,” she said sadly.

“Well, there’s always tomorrow night!” you said and laughed. You looked back down the hallway and saw a groupie go into Jim’s room and the door shut.

Emma’s theory made even more sense when you walled by Jeff’s room and heard various bangs and moaning noises coming from inside. Suddenly, Jimmy walked over to his door, opened it, peeked in and yelled, “Go get ‘er mate!”

Chelsea screamed and Jeff laughed. He shut the door and you three kept walking.

“See what I mean?” Emma said throwing her hands in the air.

“You never know,” Jimmy said. “Keith could be in there right now, stark naked, sitting on a chair, legs open, waiting for you while you’re out here sulking about not getting laid. So go in there and rape and pillage and plunder for all its worth!” he yelled the last part.

“Ok, but there’s one problem with that,” Emma said as she reached the door.

“Whats that?” you asked.

“You can't rape the willing,” she said, grinned and walked into the room, shutting the door behind her.

“She’s got a point,” you said and walked up to your room door, which Jimmy opened for you.

You walked in and found the balcony door still open. as you walked over to it, you heard Jimmy shut the door behind you. You closed the sliding glass doors and reached up and closed the blinds. When you brought your arm back down, Jimmy had his wrapped around your waist and was kissing your neck. You turned around to face him as he kissed you on the lips. When he pulled away from you, you looked into his deep green eyes and lost all control. He picked you up gently and placed you on the bed. He slid off his coat and got on the bed next to you. You two made out for a little while, totally absorbing all the energy that just seeped from Jimmy. After a little while, he couldn’t take it anymore. He moved on top of you with one leg on either side of you, bent over and kissed you again. You reached up and unbuttoned his silky white shirt and slid it off his arms. he reached up and pushed his hair behind his ears, but one little strand slipped back out which you found incredibly sexy. He reached down and took off your blouse. He started kissing you all the way down to your mini skirt which he yanked off in one motion. You started into his eyes for a moment before unbuttoning his tight black slacks. Unfortunately, he lost his balance in the process, and he fell off the bed, taking you and the comforter with him. You landed on him, but rolled over so he was on top again. You looked down to find his pants had come off. You two undressed further, and just before that initial motion occurred, you thought you were the happiest woman alive.

You woke up in the morning under the comforter, on the floor, with a very sore back. This was probably caused by both the fact that you were lying on the floor and that you just had a wild night with your idol. You looked up to your left to find that it was 11.00 in the morning. You then turned to your right to find Jimmy naked, sleeping peacefully. You moved over the six inches that was between you two and snuggled up to him. He grunted sleepily and put his arms around you before going back to sleep, if he even woke up to begin with.

As you drifted back off to sleep in Jimmy’s arms, Jeff was waking up in the same position in his own bed. He peeked open his eyes to find Chelsea, his blonde bombshell, snuggled into his chest. He grinned and slipped back into a peaceful sleep.

Just then, Emma and Julie woke up simultaneously in their individual rooms. They weren’t snuggled up to their honeys, but were next to them underneath the tousled dirty sheets. They each turned over to look at who they had just spent the night with and smiled. They both were tempted to snuggle back to sleep, but were curious to see who was up and what metaphorical metals they now possessed. Emma slipped quietly out of bed, which she didn’t really need to as Keith was definitely not going to wake up after last night. She opened her door and peered down the hallway. When she did, she saw Julie doing the same thing. They walked out into the hall and met infront of the elevators.

“So, how was it?” Julie asked and smiled.

“Well, he was drunk, so it was kinda sloppy. But ut was good anyway,” she said and shuffled her feet. “How was Chris?” she asked and leaned against the wall next to the elevator.

“Perfect,” she said and sighed. “He’s everything I wanted. Very gentle and romantic, always thinks of you,” she said and grinned.

“So nothing, erm, rough?” Emma asked.

“No, I’m not like Lilly. She’s probably into that kind of stuff.”

“Speaking of which, I wonder how her and the boy wonder were last night,” Emma grinned.

“Boy wonder?” Julie asked confused.

“Did you or did you not look at his pants last night? That boy is GIFTED,” she said and laughed hysterically.

“No I didn’t. I was too busy staring at Chris.” She said.

“Well no duh,” she said and laughed.

“God I’m hungry. I wonder if its too late for breakfast,” Julie said and looked around.

“Its eleven o clock, what do you think?” Chris said as he walked into the corridor in a robe.

“I’m gunna go check on Keith,” Emma said and walked away. She could tell where this was going.

“Hey hunky. Sleep at all?” she asked Chris and kissed him as he walked up.

“Yes, after a bit I did. You were great,” he said leaning one arm against the wall above her head.

“You weren’t exactly great,” she said looking at Chris. He started to get nervous. “You were awesome,” she said and smiled widely. He let out a sigh of relief and pushed off the wall.

“Lets go get properly dressed and look for breakfast,” he said and led her back to the room.

At 11.30, Jimmy woke up. He looked down at you and smiled. At the same time, you woke up too and looked up at him.

“Good morning gorgeous,” he said and kissed your forehead.

“Good morning,” you replied. “and thanks for the awesome night last night. I’ve never felt anything like it.” You ran your finger up and down the little indent in his chest.

“Me neither. Its so hard to explain right now, but last night, it was like being taken to another world,” he said and sighed.

“I wonder if anyone else slept last night,” you said and stretched. You heard your back crack and it felt better. Jimmy looked down at you and laughed when he heard it. Suddenly, the door opened up and Jeff trudged in, all cleaned up and dressed.

“Sorry mate, just looking for some toilet paper,” he said and shielded his eyes as he felt along the wall for the bathroom. Jimmy pulled the blanket up further as Jeff tripped over Jimmy’s quickly discarded pants.

“What, no time to fold anything?” he asked as he found the bathroom.

“Why do you need toilet paper anyway?” you asked.

“We threw all our rolls at passing cars. Apparently it turns her on. So we used all the rolls we could find and now we can't use it for what it’s intended for,” he explained from the bathroom.

“Ok then, I can't believe I asked,” you said and yawned.

“Oh yeah,” jeff said still in the bathroom. “We’re all going out for lunch in a half an hour, so you’d better get cleaned up,” he said as he walked out of the bathroom with a roll of toilet paper.

“Ok, fine with me,” Jimmy said. Jeff was shielding his eyes again, trying to leave, when he tripped over your bra and fell onto your ‘bed’ on the floor. Of course, he landed right on you, pulling the blanket down to your waist. And of course, you still weren’t wearing anything.

“Oh shit, sorry,” he said and got up. His face was bright red, but judging by his eyes, you didn’t think it was from embarrassment. And as he left, he tuned back to you one more time. You looked at him, and that look was there again. The one you kept seeing yesterday, but you thought it was just the brandy. You finally figured out what it was.

Click Here to Read More..

Heart Full of Soul Pt. 1

Rating: R for a scene of relatively innapropriate content. Could really get a PG-13, but I'd rather warn you lot than have you read it and get all freaked out.
Author's Notes: I haven't touched this one in a while haha.


It was August of 1966, and at the age of 21, it was your first time flying alone. You were going from your home town of London to visit your old-friend-turned-pen-pal in New York. Your mother, nervous as usual, had lectured you the night before on airport safety, including a brief history on the Mile High Club. The only part you liked about your mother’s nervousness was that you were given first class tickets to insure you were being watched by a stewardess at all times.

You were dropped off at the airport by your entire family at 10.30 even through your flight was to take off at 1.45.

“I want to make sure you get past security and you’re ok,” your mom said as she fixed your feathery hair.

“Ok, whatever,” You replied and pulled away from your mom. You turned around and found your little brother, Michael, talking to a stranger in a trench coat. You ran over and scooped him up.

“You pay so much attention to me, a 21 year old, yet you barely notice my 11 year old brother,” you quipped and put him down.

Two hours later, you finally convinced your family to let you go and board your plane. They waved good bye as you passed through the doors.

By the time you got through the incredibly slow security, you had to run to the plane, throw your bag into the overhead compartment, and flop down in your seat. The stewardess went over all her emergency procedures and you watched intently. When she was done, you buckled your belt and the plane took off. You hadn’t even noticed who was sitting next to you until you were in the air and had permission to unbuckle. When you finally looked to your left (you got an aisle seat), in a row were Jeff Beck and Jimmy Page.

“Hello,” Jeff said unbuckling his seatbelt.

“Umm, hello,” you replied and smiled. He was a lot cuter up close.

“How are you doing this fine day?” Jimmy said as he peered around Jeff’s head. You could feel yourself blushing.

“I am doing fine, and how are you?”

“I’m doing well. I think I could use a brandy, but other than that I’m fine.” Jimmy replied a little nervously. You could tell he didn’t like flying.

“Me too,” Jeff said. “Would you like something?”

“Umm, I’ll just have a tea. It’s a bit early for me to be drinking,” you replied and smiled. Jeff smiled back and got up.

“Well, to each his, or her, own I say. I’ll go tell the stewardess to bring them when she comes by. So it’s two brandies and one tea. Sugar? Milk?”

“No, straight up. I mean black,” you fumbled as you saw Jimmy check you out from the corner of your eye.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I’ve never had a tea ‘straight up’ before. Is this some southern thing?” Jeff joked as he slid by your seat.

“Oh, yes because I’m definitely a southerner,” you said as he walked down the aisle.

“Where are you from?” Jimmy asked as he moved into Jeff’s seat.

“Shepards Bush. Born and raised,” you said proudly. Jimmy put his elbow on the armrest and your arms touched. It sent a shiver up your spine like an electric charge.

“isn’t that all working class? I don’t mean you look poor, but not being from London, we’ve all heard stories,” Jimmy said and never took his eyes off yours.

“well, both my parents are musicians, so we’re not really working class. all me friends’ parents are working class though,” you explained and smiled at Jimmy. He smiled back.

“Interesting,” he started to say when Jeff appeared back down the aisle.

“How did you get those so quick?” you asked.

“She was just about to come down the aisle, so she figured she could give me them now,” he said. Unfortunately, when Jeff moved in front of you, back to you, with the brandies, you hit some turbulence. This meant that both the brandies went onto the head of the person in front of you. Thankfully they were on the rocks so there wasn’t much drink to spill. Jeff opened his mouth in shock and ran to get some napkins.

“Ah, that Jeff. Always getting into trouble,” He said. Then, without warning, he took your hand in his. He held it up to his face and studied your turquoise ring. You weren’t expecting it, so your stomach did a little jerk.

“Very pretty,” Jimmy said. “a gorgeous ring for a gorgeous woman,” he said and kissed your hand before carefully placing it back on the armrest.

“What a gentleman,” You said then turned your head to look down the aisle. Running towards you was Jeff, carrying an entire roll of paper towels. He then proceeded to trip on the carpeting and fall face first. The stewardess came up to him immediately and offered to help him up. He took her hand, got up, and smiled seductively at her. She simply turned on her heels and walked back to her drink cart.

“What a klutz,” Jimmy said and made you laugh.

“You have a very pretty laugh,” he said and smoothed out your hair. His touch was like electricity running from his fingers through every nerve in your body. And you liked it.

“Thank you,” you said and watched Jeff go over to the people sitting in front of you. He handed the older man the whole roll, apologised and returned to his new seat, Jimmy’s old one. He sighed as he sat down again.

“Umm,” Jimmy said, “Where’s our proper brandies and this young lady’s tea?” he asked with a sly grin that made you quietly giggle.

“Ah bloody hell,” he got up again and went to the stewardess. She eyes him suspiciously after the incident with his roaming eyes.

“You know, I never got your name,” Jimmy said turning back to you.

“It’s Lilly. Lilly Cooper.”

“Very pretty...uh oh. Here comes trouble.”

You looked down the aisle and Keith Relf was walking in your direction. He looked at your legs, then you and smiled. You couldn’t help but smile back. You had to be polite, right?

“Hey Jim, nice seat,” Keith said eyeing you again. This was going to get tacky.

“Erm, thanks,” Jimmy replied and shifted nervously in his seat.

“And what’s your name, miss?” he asked and winked. Eww.

“Lilly,” you answered and Keith grinned.

“What a gorgeous name,” he said and took your hand, kissing the same place Jimmy did (you could never forget). “and what a gorgeous woman,” he placed your hand back down.

“Thanks, I mean that’s sweet and everything,” you explained, “but I’m not interested. Really. No offence?” you asked.

“Sure, I guess not,” he mumbled and watched Jeff come down the aisle juggling two brandies and a tea. Keith took the tea from him and took a sip.

“Thanks Jeffey boy, but next time, I like cream in mine,” Keith said looking at Jeff. You were the first one to speak.

“Well, the reason there’s no cream in there is because that happens to be my tea you’re drinking.”

Keith looked at you with a shocked expression on his face. Jimmy laughed and stood up.

“Here Lilly,” Jimmy said and took your hand. “I’ll get you that tea. Come with me.”

you got up and followed Jimmy past Keith and you watched him check you out (again) from the corner of your eye.

“Well that was interesting,” Jimmy said as he led you down the aisle.

“You called it.”

The two of you reached the stewardess’ place and Jimmy asked for your tea, explaining the new predicament. They went to make it, and Jimmy turned to you.

“Wait right here will ya love? I need to use the not-so-little-boy’s room,” he said with a sly smile and a wink. You nodded and turned your body back to where your seat was. There, in the window seat, was Jeff. He had his head pressed up to the wall and was just staring out. You started to feel sorry for him. All the other band members had either wives or groupies or even girlfriends except Jeff. How did you know? You read NME.

He looked so sad, you were almost tempted to leave and go sit with him for a little chat; but then you remembered Jimmy was coming back so you waited.

Jimmy came out just as the tea finished. You took the tea in one hand, and Jimmy in the other. You two walked down the aisle holding hands and bevies.

When you got to your seat, Jeff looked up and you saw something in his eyes. Not exactly sadness, not exactly jealousy. At that moment you couldn’t place what it was, but there was something there. Or it could have just been the brandy.

The rest of the flight you spent chatting, holding Jimmy’s hand, or drinking more tea. By the time you reached New York, you had drank four cups of tea and had to pee really badly.

“Where are you staying?” Jeff asked as he took out his bags from the overhead compartment.

“Hilton. You?”

“Expensive...” Jimmy quipped as he stood up. “Then again that’s where we’re staying too.”

“Really? What room?” you asked.

“I don’t know. Something on the tenth floor. They never tell us anything.” Jeff said.

“Me too! I forget my room, the number’s written down somewhere,” you said and stood up in the aisle.

You then saw Jimmy whisper something to Jeff and he nodded. They slung their bags over their shoulders, and picked you up. Jimmy took your arms and Jeff your feet. You protested, but soon they were carrying you out of the plane. They waved good-bye to the stewardesses, who could only look on in confusion.

“But I’m wearing a skirt!” you yelled a little too loudly.

“Then we must be sure not to spread your legs like this!” Jeff said and pulled your legs open as soon as a little old lady walked by. She gasped and said something under her breath relating to “the youth of today”.

They finally put you down at the security, because the guards told them to. Jimmy had caught a case of the giggles and it was spreading quickly. Jeff could barely talk he was laughing so hard. When you walked through the metal detector, you tried not to giggle. Once you made it through, however, you burst out laughing. The guard looked at you three suspiciously but then just shook his head.

“So,” Jimmy giggled. “Who’s picking you up?” he managed to ask.

“My friend who lives in New York. We’re sharing a hotel room for the week.”

“You’re only here a week?” Jeff asked and picked up his bags.

You hadn’t thought of that until now. What would happen after a week, or even today? Would you ever see Jimmy again?

“Well, I guess so,” you pouted.

“Look love, when your week is over, you can come with us while we tour, savvy?” Jimmy said and brushed your hair out of your face.

“Are you sure I won't get in the way?” you asked and stared into his green eyes.

“Positive. And your friend can come too if she wants,” he said and took your arm.

“Or if she’s a fan,” Jeff said as he went through the metal detector.
”Oh yeah, she loves you guys. She’s been a fan since the beginning,” you told him and grinned.

“Well that’s a good sign,” Jeff said and led you to the exit.

When you got there, your best friend Emma was already waiting, and when she saw who you were walking with, she almost peed her pants.

“Hey chicky!” Emma said and gave you one of her infamous bear hugs. You replied by spinning her around while still in her vice grip.

“Emma, this is Jimmy Page and this is Jeff Beck. Although, I bet you already knew that,” you said and she grinned.

“Yes I knew, nice to meet you. Is Keith with you by any chance?” She asked and grinned even wider.

Then, directly on cue, Keith put his head between your and Jimmy’s. He was blatantly drunk.

“Hello dear gahl!” he yelled into your ear. “ ‘Oo’s the bird?”

“This is my friend Emma,” you said. She grinned at Keith.

“Hello,” she said.

“Hello!” he yelled and walked between you and Jimmy. He stopped when he reached Emma and put his hand round her waist.

“Where are you staying?”

“The Hilton with Lilly. We’re sharing a room.”

“Gear!” Keith shouted. You looked around to see how many people were staring. Just as you guessed, everyone was.

“Why don’t you stay with me baby? ‘cause as I’m seeing things,” he said, but was interrupted by Jeff.

“which would be double approaching triple,” everyone laughed except Keith.

“As I’m seeing things,” he emphasized. “It looks like Lilly and Jimmy will be sharing a room. So where are you gonna be? alone? I don’t think so,” he said and breathed in her face. But Emma was used to that, she was a bar tender.

“Well, ok. I’ll stay with you,” she said and turned to you. “If that’s ok with Lilly.”

“That’s fine with me,” you said. “Jimmy can stay with me in my room and you can stay with Keith in his room,” you put your arm around Jimmy’s waist. He pulled you closer.

“But then Chris won’t have a room,” Jimmy said.

“He can stay with me,” Jeff said scratching his head. He looked up at you with that look again. It was starting to come to you, but you still didn’t fully understand.

“OK!” Keith shouted and led Emma away. “Meet us in the car. But remember, if the limo’s a knockin’, where’s me bleedin’ luggage?” he slurred.

“The manager’s got it,” Jeff said and picked up his carry on bag.

“Well ok! Lets go then!” keith shouted as he saw the rest of the band approach.

You and jimmy held hands near the front of the parade that was the Yardbirds. Keith and Emma were behind you and you could hear him stumbling. The bags were loaded into one car and the band into another.

When you arrived at the hotel, the rooms were all rearranged and you all brought up the luggage. Once you stepped out of the elevator into the corridor, there was a rush of white noise. You peered around Jeff’s head to find the source. The entire hallway was filled to the brim with screaming girls.

“Oh shit!” Keith slurred when he saw the group. “How’d they get in?”

“Never mind that how are WE gonna get in?” Jim said from the back. So far, they were very lucky the girls hadn’t noticed them.

“Well at least they don’t know we’re here,” Chris said and everyone sighed. Except keith.

“I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU PEOPLE DIDN’T NOTICE US!” Keith yelled at the top of his lungs.

“Spoke too soon,” Emma said and went to push the elevator button again. “Maybe we can run abck on the elevator...”

but it was too late. The girls all turned around, took one look at the band, and ran towards them.

“Bloody hell,” Jeff said and pushed his way into the elevator, but the luggage got in the way. The girls were getting closer and closer each second. Chris spotted another elevator next to the other one and pushed the button. The elevator thankfully opened a second later and everyone rushed in. the girls were 5 feet away when you went to get into the elevator and the doors started to shut.

“Lilly!” Jimmy shouted and tried to stop the doors from closing.

“Leave her Jimmy! The other girls are getting too close!” Keith shouted and let the doors close.

You were left standing in front of the elevator just as the other girls stormed it. You got trampled underneath all of them, and therefore, couldn’t see what floor they had gotten off on.

“Wait, wasn’t she with the band?” some girl shouted and pointed at you. All the surrounding girls stoped and looked right at you. You suddenly got flooded with questions.

“Where are they?”

“What room are they staying in?”

“Does Chris have a girlfriend?”

“Are you one of their girlfriends?”

Your head was spinning and you thought you were going to scream. Just then, the other elevator opened up and the roadies became visible. Suddenly THEY were getting flooded with girls and their fanish questions. You took this opportunity to slip out and go down the stairs.

You went up to the next floor and went to the elevator from there. You pressed the ‘up’ button and the elevator was there within seconds. When it opened, you almost passed out again from shock.

“Jimmy!” you shouted. You had somehow gotten the elevator they were still in and you ran inside. Jimmy enveloped you in a big hug and you grinned. He smelled good; a combination of incense and green tea.

“How’d you guys stay in here all this time without anyone seeing you?”

“Magic dear gahl!” Keith shouted.

“Well let’s just pray no one pushed the 10 button or we’re all screwed. That’s where the fans are heckling your roadies.” You informed them.

Everyone looked over to see what button was lit. It was 10.

“Ok, when we get there,” Chris said. “As soon as it opens, push the close door button and hit 1. We’ll talk to the manager then.”

The elevator dinged and the doors began to open. There was a rush of white noise and then it all stopped as if they knew they were in the elevator. Chris reached over and pushed the close button. Nothing happened. He tried again. Still nothing happened.

“Oh shit....” Jeff said and cowered in the back. Jimmy pushed you behind him, and you became sandwiched between the two guitarists.

“I don’t want them to recognise you,” he said and patted your head. You turned around to Jeff.

“Does this always happen?” you asked him and grinned.

“Yeah, but usually its just in the sidewalk. I knew something was wrong when there wasn’t anyone out there!”

The door finally shut, but with an extra passenger on board. You eyed the maximum capacity sign.

“Oh my god I can't believe I made it in here!” she said. She was a tall blonde bombshell wearing mod clothing and sporting a liverpudlian accent.

“Well,” Jim said but was cut off by this new girl.

“Is Jeff in here?” she asked.

You turned around to look at him. His eyes were bright and he was grinning.

“I’m back here,” he said and raised his hand. You all tried to shift around so she could get to him. You smiled at her as she squeezed by and she smiled back. She seemed nice, but you hoped for some reason she wouldn’t break his heart

Click Here to Read More..

Walls

Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: This makes me laugh whole-heartedly.


Mary walked into Andy’s New York hotel room to find him on his knees with his ear pressed to the left-hand wall.
“What are you doing?”
Andy touched a finger to his lips and waved her over. She crouched down beside him.
“Stewart and Kelsi just got back from a date and I think…” Andy paused, listening intently to the wall, then continued in a soft, conspiratorial voice, “I think he’s going to make his move.”
Mary gasped, and then frowned.
“And you’re going to listen in?”
“Yes,” answered Andy, innocently.
“Andy,” said Mary, disapprovingly.
“I just want to make sure my mate gets his piece, don’t you want the same for your mate? And these walls are paper-thin; I would have heard everything anyway.”
“You’re a sick man”
Suddenly, Andy perked up.
“Oh! Listen, listen!” he said in an excited whisper.
Mary cupped her ear to the wall. On the other side she could hear Stewart’s voice; he was speaking in a language that was unfamiliar to her; graceful and lilting. When he finished, she heard Kelsi say something low in an appreciative tone. Mary turned to Andy, who was trying hard not to laugh.
“Was that…”
“Arabic?” he finished for her, “Yes. He does that every time.”
"Every time? What do you…”
Suddenly, the door to Andy’s room opened and Sting walked in. He paused for a moment to take in the sight of Andy and Mary crouching on the floor by the wall, and then joined them.
“You missed the Arabic bit,” said Andy.
“Damn. That’s my favorite part,” Sting bemoaned.
Mary stared at the two men, nonplussed.
“Do you two… do this often?” Mary ventured.
“Well, sometimes Stewart gets a room across the hall from us. Those nights we just, you know, watch the telly or something,” answered Sting, getting into a comfortable position.
“Do you do this to each other?”
“No, just Stewart,” said Andy, “It’s pretty fascinating, really.”
“Like watching giant pandas in the wild,” mused Sting.
“Slow night, though,” Andy said, checking his watch, “They’ve barely said a word to each other. I think its nerves.”
“Know what I think?” said Sting solemnly, “I think he’s going to strike out.”
“No!” Andy said, disgusted, “He’s crazy for that girl.”
“That’s just it. She’s not some tart of the road, he likes her so he’s psyching himself out. He’s going to say or do something stupid and scare her off.”
“No way, that boy’s a right catch,” argued Andy, “And I know for a fact that Kelsi fancies him quite a bit.”
“I will bet you money that nothing happens.”
“How much?”
Sting pulled out some change from his back pocket and counted it quickly.
“Eighty-four cents.”
“Done! And you have to tell me where you hid my demo tape.”
“Fine.”
“And Stewart has no idea that you two do this?” Mary asked as Andy and Sting shook hands.
“Stewart is surprisingly unobservant,” answered Andy.
“Yeah. Kelsi, too,” Mary said after a moment’s thought.
“And he’ll sleep though anything,’ added Sting, “But that’s a different story.”
Andy snorted.
The three potential voyeurs crouched in silence for several seconds. Finally, they heard Stewart ask Kelsi if she’d like a drink.
“No! She wants sex!” Andy snarled through gritted teeth, “Fuck her stupid, Stewart!”
“No, Stewart!” whispered Sting, “She wants to learn about the embalming methods used during Middle Kingdom Egypt!”
“Sex!”
“Death!”
“There’s something profoundly wrong with you two,” Mary observed.
“Hey,” said Andy, cheekily, “You’re the one listening in on your girlfriend about to be taken advantage of by our drummer. What’s up with that?”

On the other side of the wall, Stewart examined his drink. Too much ice, he thought. He turned to watch Kelsi nurse her own beverage. He edged a bit closer to her on the couch. He tried to think of something to say. He’d already exhausted ancient Egyptian embalming practices at dinner, a topic she was well versed in, unbeknownst to him. He scanned the quiet hotel room. Was it too early to rip a phonebook in half? Perhaps it was already too late. What do we have in common? He watched her chew thoughtfully on a cherry stem. We’re both left-handed, that’s rather interesting. Then he remembered something that she’d mentioned a few days ago.
“You said you were in drum corp. during college?”
Kelsi turned to him and smiled.
“Yes, I was. And marching band in high school.”
“I’d love to hear about.”
Kelsi immediately launched into marching techniques, show themes, practicing in college parking lots during the summer, performing at football games during the fall, traveling to competitions all along the east coast, learning and helping to teach tonal bass parts (she’d had been a bass drummer), uniforms, the strange fraternal qualities that marching percussion lines often exhibited, and so on.



Andy and Sting looked quizzically at Mary.
“Marching band?” asked Sting.
“Yeah,” said Mary. “We both did it, I was in color guard.”
Before Sting had chance to reply, the happy chatter on the other side of the wall was abruptly cut off. For several long seconds there was silence. Mary, Andy and Sting stared blankly at the wall and then at each other, not sure what to think.


Stewart carefully parted lips with Kelsi. He watched as she took a deep breath, mouth still open with surprise. She focused her eyes on him. He grinned sheepishly. Perhaps I shouldn’t have interrupted her mid-sentence. But, after a moment of uncertainty on his part, she began to smile broadly. She leaned foreword and kissed him back, with gusto.


Mary jumped at the sound of Stewart’s couch bumping against the wall. Then, silence. All three strained their ears. Faintly, they heard a girlish gasp which was followed, even more so faintly, by a girlish giggle. Another loud thud as the couch bumped the wall.
“I think we’re done here,” Said Mary, blushing.
The three straightened and began to move about the room. Andy smiled up at Sting.
“You owe me some pocket change.”
Sting sighed and handed Andy the coinage.
“Your tape is in the A &M Records studio garden…”
Sting gave a sly grin.
“In London.” He finished.
“Damn it,” said Andy, defeated. “Oh, well.”
He looked at the change in his hand.
“I’m going to buy some Junior Mints,” he announced.
Andy turned to Mary, giving her a “join me?” look. She rolled her eyes and sighed good-naturedly. They left the room together.

Click Here to Read More..

Can't Stand Losing You

Rating:PG
Author's Notes: This one's a long'un.



So, I was stuck with my family on yet another vacation that my father affectionately, and incorrectly, dubbed “Family Bonding Experience Part 3”. Parts one and two had miserably failed at the hands of disease and disaster, respectively. This time, though, my father claimed that it was fool-proof and that it would be perfect for family bonding. He had booked us for a week in a villa in Montserrat, a place riddled with sun, surf, and scrumptious island boys (my father had said something different than the island boys, but I decided to fill in my own idea of fun.).
As soon as we set foot on the island, I had a wave of mixed feelings. I was disgusted at the though of spending a week with my parents and two younger brothers, but I was completely ecstatic to check out the beautiful scenery. The mountains stretched as far as I could see, and the water was the most beautiful shade of blue that I had ever seen.
We unpacked in about an hour (it took me this long because my little brothers kept sneaking in my room and stealing my stuff), then I decided that I wanted to hit the beach before dinner. I slipped on my bathing suit and put my towel under my arm. I slipped on my flip flops by the door, yelled to my mom where I was going, and slid out the back door. I walked past the pool (I could swim in a pool back at home, but I can’t swim at the beach), through the gate, and down the fifty foot path to the beach. There was no one in sight when I got there, so I spread out my towel and basked in the late-afternoon sun. Despite the fleeting sunlight, it was still rather warm, and I was feeling happy.
Suddenly, I heard voices to my left. I leaned up on my elbows and looked over. There, setting up volleyball net, was all three members of The Police, their manager Miles, and road manager Kim. I shielded my eyes from the setting sun so that I could be sure that it was, indeed, really them. I saw Stewart turn around and look at me. I didn’t know what to do: should I look away the way I would if it were someone in class, should I wave, or should I not do anything? Well, luckily I didn’t have to think about it much longer, since within a few seconds he was making his way over to me. When he got to my blanket, he squatted down to my height and extended his hand.
“Hi, I’m Stewart Copeland.” I shook his hand and smiled like a buffoon.
“Oh, I know. I’m Mary.” He smiled at me, and I melted. I had always had a bit of a celebrity crush on him, which was only made bigger when he flashed his goofy smile.
“Are you new here?” he asked and sat down on the beach next to me and crossed his legs. This, due to his apparent short bathing suit, gave me quite an interesting view.
“Sort of. My family and I are renting a villa for a week as sort of a ‘family bonding’ thing. We’re right there,” I said and pointed behind me to the villa.
“Oh, that’s a nice one. Mine is actually right there,” he said, pointing to the villa next to mine, “and Andy’s is next to mine, with Sting next to him.” I couldn’t believe it. I was vacationing on a beautiful island, with the boys of the Police next door to me. We heard Stewart being summoned to go play volleyball, and he got up from the sand.
“Hey,” he said, brushing the sand off him, “we have an odd number of players. Do you want to come play with us?” I smiled, and nodded my head. I don’t think that I could have gotten a cohesive word or sentence out of my mouth. He held his hand down to me, and I took it, hoisting myself up. When I reached standing position, however, I continued to move forward, and I crashed heard first into his chest. We both let out an “oof”, and I looked up at him. We started at each other for a few seconds before he was called again, and we had to separate and walk over to the net.
When we got there, Stewart introduced me to the others, and they all smiled warmly at me, with Andy waving like a fool. I smiled and waved back at him.
“Ok, we need to pick teams,” Miles said. “Stewart, come over here with me. You and I will pick teams.” Stewart went over to his brother and the rest of us subconsciously lined up before them. “I’ll go first.” Miles said and eyed us all. “I pick…Kim.” He pumped his fist in the air and went to stand beside Miles.
“Sting,” Stewart said, obviously going for height. I couldn’t think of why Stewart would pick him on any other occasion.
“Andy,” Kim said and we both looked at each other, a surprised look on our faces. Apparently, we had both thought that I was going to get picked.
“Mary, I would have chosen you anyway. It’s not because you’re last, I promise,” Stewart said apologetically. I shrugged, walked over to him, and put my hand on his shoulder.
“It’s ok, really. I was never very athletic as a kid, so I’m used to it. However,” I said, turning to the rest of them, “I am quite good at volleyball.” I grinned, and they all made fake “ooh, I’m scared” noises. We laughed it off, and Miles waved us over to the net.
“Ok, it’s three on three. We play to eleven. The outside boundaries have been marked in the sand by Andy’s dainty toes.” We laughed and said various deviations of “ok, let’s play.” Miles served the ball, and it came gracefully sailing over to our side. Stewart was on the left, I was in the middle, and Sting was on the right. I don’t know if they purposely separated themselves, or if it just happened this way. The game started off like a normal game, with both sides equally scoring. After about twenty minutes, the score was 7 to 5, them. Stewart had called a time-out for a game-plan huddle. We formed a circle, arms on each other’s shoulders.
“Ok, look, we can’t let them win this. We may have the height,” Stewart said, “But they seem to have the agility. Kim can zip around that beach like it’s nobody’s business. We have the power, as displayed by Sting-o’s killer arm muscles. However, they seem to have some sort of strategy, otherwise we would be winning. We have to get our heads in the game, people! Ok? Break!” he walked away from the circle with Sting and me looking very confused. We had no idea what the point of that speech was, but we went along with it. When we all resumed our positions, Kim served the ball. It went back and forth a few times with no real events. However, one time when it came our way, it was headed directly between Stewart and me. We dove for it, crashed mid-air, and landed on the ground. When I finally opened my eyes again, I was looking up right into Stewart’s green-brown eyes. He was lying on top of me, apparently which was right where he had landed. His curls had flopped down around his head and created a beautiful halo.
“Are…are you…ok?” he asked. I nodded and smiled.
“Yeah, I’m ok. We just collided hard, is all.”
“Oh, good. I’m glad you’re not hurt,” he said and laughed. I melted again at his goofy smile. He rolled off me, stood up, and helped me up again. We brushed ourselves off, and Sting picked up the volleyball. Once we were all situated again, he served the ball. Another ten or so minutes later, we had lost, 11 to 8. It was ok, because I had ample time to flirt with Stewart. We were kicking sand at each other, pushing each other out of the way, and laughing. It was obvious that I liked him, but I wondered if the others, if not Stewart himself, could see if he liked me.
“Well, good game, guys,” Miles said as him and Sting took down the net. “Same time tomorrow?” everyone nodded in agreement. “How about you Mary?” he asked me. I looked around from person to person and smiled. How could I turn down a volleyball game with them? I nodded furiously and told them that they could count on seeing me here tomorrow. They cheered and I smiled at them.
“Hey,” Stewart said putting his arm around my shoulder, “it gets dark in about an hour, so I was wondering if you wanted to take a little walk down the beach before it gets too dark.” He smiled down at me, but it wasn’t his usual goofy grin. It was one that made me go giggly even more than the goofy one; it was one that said “I have something fun in mind, I can’t wait, and I know you can’t either.”
“Yeah, that would be fun.”
“Good,” he said and walked me back towards my villa. “This is the more beautiful way, trust me.”
“Oh, I do.” I said smiling. We walked for a little bit in silence, just listening to the waves and the distant villa sounds.
“So,” Stewart said, finally breaking the silence, “Where are you from?”
“Massachusetts. It’s not even close enough to Boston to be cool,” I said sadly.
“Oh come on, it can’t be that bad.”
“Yeah, it’s not too bad. I guess it’s just a case of the grass is greener on the other side. I always wished that I lived anywhere else than where I am now.”
“Well, one day, you will be famous, then you’ll get to see all the places I’ve seen.” He smiled at me, and I returned the action. We stopped at a desolate spot on the beach, and turned to watch the sun set. He held me close, and I put my arms around him. We stood there, holding each other, watching the sunset.
“You know,” he said looking down at me, “I know we’ve only just met, but I feel something towards you that I have never felt for anyone else before.” He smiled, non-goofily, down at me. I suddenly realized that my celebrity crush on him had developed into a real, full-out love. He was adorable, funny, talented, and he liked me, too.
“I feel the same way. I think we definitely have something between us,” I said, and I ran my fingers up his chest. He leaned down, and I leaned up. We met around half way and kissed passionately on the lips. I heard waves crashing around me, but this time they were real waves. I always heard about people seeing fireworks or hearing waves at their first kiss, but this time, the waves were real. However, they may as well have been in my head, because the whole thing seemed surreal. When we finally pulled apart, the sun was almost completely set. We kissed a few more times before I told him that I should be getting back to my family. We were holding each other all the way back to my villa. The mood, however, was completely shattered when we saw my mother on the beach, talking to Miles, absolutely freaking out. When we came into sight, Miles pointed in our direction, and my mother spun around furiously. She came marching up to us, a fire in here eyes.
“Where the hell were you?!” she yelled at me. I subconsciously held on tighter to Stewart, half out of fear and half to use him as a shield.
“I…I…I went for a walk down the beach.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?!”
“I, I don’t know.” I said. She was enraged at me.
“And who is this man you’re with?! Do you even know him?!”
“Yes, mother, I do. This is Stewart Copeland. He’s the drummer in the Police.”
“A musician?!” she exclaimed. I had forgotten that she shunned any relationships with musicians in the family after a guitar player broke her heart in the forties.
“Yes.”
“And if it makes a difference,” Stewart said, “I like your daughter, a lot. And she likes me. I would never cause her any harm, if that’s what you’re afraid of.” My mother’s emotions didn’t change at all.
“Well, I’m sorry to say, but you won’t be seeing her again. Mary, get in the house. You’re not leaving the house at all for the rest of the week.” I threw an absolute fit. I cried, I clung to Stewart, and he clung to me. Sting even came over to try to reason with her, but it did nothing. She ended up dragging me away by the arm as I frantically waved to Stewart. I think I saw a tear in his eye, but I can’t be sure.

----------

For the rest of the week, I was kept inside the villa. I was allowed to go out to the pool to swim and sunbathe, but that was because it was fenced in. From time to time, I would see Stewart walk by the front window, looking to catch a glimpse of me. I would see him walk by, but my father would always be sitting next to the window, so I couldn’t get over to wave to him. One day, as my family was all on the beach, I heard a soft knock on the front door. I walked over to the it, and opened it to find Stewart standing there. I immediately enveloped him in a giant hug, and he kissed me square on the lips. We held each other for a minute before he urgently pulled us apart.
“Come away with me,” he said, looking right into my eyes.
“Where? Go with you to where?”
“England. We finished the album, and we’re going back to England to remix it, then we’re going on tour. Please, come with me. I can’t stand to be without you. I guess you could say, I can’t stand loosing you.” We both chuckled, but it couldn’t lighten our mood.
“I can’t. My mother would legally disown me, my father would stop talking to me, and plus, everything I own is back in Massachusetts.” He looked sadder than a little boy who had just broken his new toy. I hugged him again, and he held me tight. He kissed the top of my head, stroked my hair, and then he lifted my head so he could kiss me on the lips. Just then, my mother walked into the room. She dropped her water bottle that she had come in to refill.
“Get out of my house you creep!” she yelled at him. She picked up the nearest objects she could find and started throwing them at him.
“One day,” Stewart said, covering his head and walking out the door, “I’ll find you! I promise, one day I’ll find you!” when he walked out that door, I didn’t believe that he would ever be able to find me. I never told him my last name, or my town. How would he find me? I hoped, though, that he still would.

----------
Twenty five or so years later, I was standing in the front row at Fenway Park. It was 2007, and the Police had gotten back together. The whole show, I was as close as humanly possible, and I was watching Stewart’s every move. I thought that he saw me once, but I didn’t know for sure. He was older of course, as was I, and he had glasses, as did I; who knows if he saw me or not.
One thing was for sure, though: my friend’s brother-in-law was the head security guard, and he promised to get me backstage. So, when the show was done, I went right over to him and gave him a big hug. He looked around suspiciously, then quickly ushered me to the backstage area. He got me to the dressing room door, and then walked away, leaving me to my own devices. I knocked on the door, and I was told, by Stewart of course, to come in. When I walked in that room and I met eyes with Stewart, we both broke down and ran into each other’s arms. We were crying tears of joy and hugging like the world was crashing down upon us.
“It’s been decades!” he exclaimed, kissing me on the forehead.
“I know! I’ve missed you so much! Every time your songs come on the radio, I cry, thinking about how much I’ve missed you.” We sat down on the couch, and we spent two whole hours catching up. We both found that we were currently single, and we decided to date, like we would have way back then. I went on tour with him, and we were just like it was back on the beaches in Montserrat. There was one distinct difference, though: my mother wasn’t around.

Click Here to Read More..

"I was wondering..."

Rating: G (Oh yeah... it's fluff.)
Author's Note: This is fricken adorable =)



That’s the third time he’s tapped me on the shoulder. I thought as I hastily scribbled down the notes from the board. If I turn around, he’s going to talk to me, and not stop. I continued writing, and I felt the tap again. I’m going to get in trouble, I just know it, I thought. However, I let my better judgment slide as I put down my pencil and turned around.
“Yes?” I asked Stewart.
“I was wondering,” he said, fiddling with his pencil. “If you, erm, if you – ”
“Stewart?” the teacher called.
“Yes?” he asked timidly, looking like a startled deer.
“Is there a problem?” she pulled her glasses down her nose.
“Umm, no, there isn’t.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, yes I am.”
“May I continue teaching my class then?”
“Yes.” He said quietly.
“Thank you.” She went back to the board and started writing notes again. I turned back around in my chair and resumed copying them down. I heard Stewart furiously scribble something down on his paper behind me. I assumed he was catching up on the notes, until I felt him tap me on the shoulder. I sighed and turned around again.
“What?” I whispered, watching the teacher out of the corner of my eye. He slid a folded piece of lined paper to me and I took it, turning back around. I unfolded the note, and saw what he wrote to me, in his scrawled, frantic handwriting:
“I was wondering, do you like food? Check ‘yes’ or ‘no’.”
I could barely keep myself from laughing. It was such a typical drummer thing to do. However, I played along, ticked ‘yes’, folded it up, and passed it back to him. I heard his scribble some more, then he tapped me again. I turned around, took the note, and turned back. Underneath my ticked answer, he had scribbled:
“Well, then, do you want to go out to get something to eat with me today?”
I turned around to face Stewart. He was grinning from ear-to-ear, goofily, and his braces were shining off the fluorescent lighting. I couldn’t help but smile back as I leaned on his desk and wrote “yes :)” within his view. I passed it back to him, unfolded, and watched his eyes light up as he read my response. He looked up at me, grinned again, and started laughing, almost giggling, quietly, under his breath.
“Stewart?”
“I’m sorry, I’ll stop talking,” he said, startled, to the teacher.
“You had better,” she said and turned back to the board.
“I’ll talk to you after class,” he whispered to me. I looked up at the clock, and, for the first time, I was counting down the minutes to the end of the class.

Click Here to Read More..

Splish Splash

Rating: PG
Author's Note: This was actually sparked by a dream I had.


“Andy! Stop splashing me!” Mary yelled and covered her face with her hands. Further down the pool, but still in the shallow end, Andy was standing, hands cupped, splashing water at his girlfriend.
“But it’s fun!” he giggled and continued to splash her. When he finally stopped a few seconds later, Mary’s soft, curly hair had become a mess of wet, sloppy curls. She simply looked at Andy, then unleashed her Tsunami wave on him; it was something her mother taught her when she was little. He was left drenched, but simply dunked under the water and fixed his blonde hair.
“Why can’t we be a normal couple?” she asked jokingly. “You know, like Stewart and Kelsi.” As if they had been listening the whole time, Kelsi suddenly let out a shriek. Across the pool, Stewart was standing on the diving board, holding Kelsi at chest-level. She was fidgeting enough to show that she didn’t like being up there, but it wasn’t too much, meaning that she liked being that close to Stewart. Andy waved at Stewart, prompting Stewart to wave back. Now, any other observer would have called what happened next an act of stupidity. However, Andy had known what Stewart’s reaction would have been, so it was all intentional.
When Stewart waved back, he let go of Kelsi. She fell into the pool with a splash, and Stewart looked down into the pool in surprise.
“Normal?” Andy turned to Mary and asked.
“OK, maybe ‘normal’ isn’t the right word,” she replied and Stewart cried “Don’t worry Kelsi, I’ll save you!!” and he jumped into the water.
“I think ‘normal’ is the furthest from the truth,” Andy said, watching Stewart trying to drag Kelsi out of the pool and give her “mouth to mouth”.
“Plus,” Mary said, moving towards Andy, “Who wants to be normal?” she jumped on the unsuspecting Andy, knocking him backwards into the water. When they came back up to the surface, Mary was in Andy’s arms, and they were both dripping wet.
“Oh, I see,” Andy said. “This is how you want to play.” He scooped her up in his arms, lifted her as high as he could, and threw her into the deep end. She let out a little squeal before she hit the water with a bit of a thud and a splash. A few seconds later, Kelsi let out a series of shrieks as Stewart began to tickle her on the patio at the side of the pool. Stewart and Andy were laughing maniacally at their recent acts of evil, but were cut short by the sound of an angry sliding door opening. Sting appeared suddenly at the opening of the door, a sheet wrapped around his waist.
“Oy! Will you all shut up?” he yelled out the door. Everyone stopped making noise and turned to look at Sting.
“Ummm, why should we do that?” Stewart asked defiantly.
“Because it’s a bit distracting with you all out there shrieking and yelling!”
“What are you doing in there that requires so much concentration?” Andy asked, and splashed Mary a little as she made her way back into the shallow end. Before Sting had a chance to answer, a female voice called from inside the house.
“Sting? Sting, are you coming back to bed? I’m waiting.” The four at the pool all looked to each other, and suppressed a little laugh.
“Alright, alright. We’ll be quieter.” Stewart said and sat on the edge of the pool, dangling his long legs in the water.
“Thanks.” Sting said dryly and went back inside.
“How could you just let him win like that?” Andy asked and put his arms around Mary.
“I didn’t.” Stewart answered and smirked.
“What do you mean?” Mary asked. “You totally let him –” she suddenly realised that Stewart had a trick up his sleeve. Well, it actually would have been in his short shorts, but that was for Kelsi to find, not Mary.
“Come on, I’ll show you.” He said, got up, and beckoned the other three to follow into the pool house. They all walked back out a few minutes later, holding buckets and Super Soakers. They were filled up in the pool, and Stewart led the way inside the house through another door from the one Sting came out of. They stopped at his bedroom door to find it slightly opened.
“Now, Andy and I will go first, with the Super Soakers. Then Kelsi and Mary will follow closely behind, with the buckets,” Stewart whispered. He held up three fingers, counting down to one. As soon as the last finger went down, Stewart stormed into the bedroom, with Andy close behind, super soakers spraying everywhere. Sting was, luckily, not caught in the act. He was caught post-romp, making out with the mystery girl. She began screaming, and Sting was shouting angrily at the two boys. Mary and Kelsi were a few seconds behind, but soon came running into the room, buckets ablaze. They threw the buckets of water straight onto the couple, soaking whatever wasn’t wet already. After the buckets became empty, everyone was simply standing there, in a state of shock.
“You,” Sting said and pointed to Andy and Stewart, “are dead men.”
“Part two of my scheme,” Stewart said nervously, “RUN!” the four assailants ran straight out of Sting’s room, with Sting, still naked, following close behind. The two girls took a turn, and when Sting didn’t follow them, stopped running. They could, however, see and hear everything that was happening in the chase. Insults were shouted, things were thrown, and they were generally causing havoc. Finally, they ran outside, and the girls followed to see what would happen. They took their fight into the pool, still shouting, but now they had incorporated splashing into their routine.
“Will these boys ever grow up?” Mary asked Kelsi.
“I really don’t think so.”
“Yeah, me either.”

Click Here to Read More..

Comparisons

Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: This was sparked from an actual argument Kelsi and I had/have.


Kelsi sighed as Mary passed over yet another one of Andy’s photos. He just had them developed, and Mary went to pick them up for him; this granted her and Kelsi, Stewart’s girlfriend, a sneak peek at them.
“I could die every time I see those lips,” Kelsi said, gazing adoringly at a picture of Stewart.
“I must admit,” Mary responded, “they are quite something.”
“Yeah, they are something, or other,” Kelsi said and the two girls started laughing.
“Oh dear, we are funny,” Mary said. “Why can’t we ever be this funny when we’re around the guys?”
“Because,” Kelsi said as she glanced over, then put aside, another picture of a tree, “we’re usually too engrossed in the boys to say anything funny. Our brains turn to mush around them, remember?”
“Yes, yes I do,” Mary sighed as she passed along a self-portrait he took, obviously in the bathroom mirror of their apartment. Kelsi laughed and took it from her.
“What colour are Andy’s eyes?” she asked and tried to make out something in the black and white photo.
“They’re a beautiful shade of blueish green.”
“Green like Stewart’s or green like a teal-ish?”
“Well,” Mary said as she quickly hid a photo of her, “since Stewart’s aren’t green, they wouldn’t be like his.” Kelsi looked at her like she had a Cacti growing out of her ear.
“What do you mean they’re not green? Of course they’re green.” Kelsi said and Mary passed another photo of Stewart over to her.
“Look,” she said, “they are obviously brown.”
“This is black and white, dumbass.” Kelsi said and fluttered the photo in front of her face. “they could be pink and you wouldn’t be able to tell.”
“Yes you would.”
“How?”
“Take David Bowie, for example – ”
“Must I?” Kelsi groaned.
“Yes. Anyway, when one sees a black and white photo of him, one can tell which eye is brown, and which isn’t.” she folded her arms defiantly.
“Of course you can, ‘cause the other one is almost white!” she exclaimed.
“Well, I still say he has brown eyes.” Mary said, not wanting to admit defeat.
“Look,” Kelsi said turning to face Mary, “I think I should know. I have gotten closer to those eyes than you have. A LOT closer.” She grinned at the thoughts running through her mind.
“Well…” Mary was trying to come up with something that she would be right at. “At least Andy has a normal sized head.” Kelsi tured around quickly and her mouth was agape.
“At least Stewart is of normal human height!”
“Andy is NOT as short as you make him out to be,” I said, wiggling my finger at her.
“He’s shorter than me,”
“Like hell he is!”
“He is, I remember,” she said defiantly. Mary deceided that she would never win, it would just turn into a “yes” “no” argument.
“At least Andy doesn’t run arund in short shorts!” Mary said.
“You know you like that.”
“Yeah, maybe I do…hey!” Mary said frowning. Kelsi laughed at her apparent lead.
“At least…err…Andy can dance!”
“ooh, that hurt,” Kelsi said, thinkning hard. “At least Stewart can write songs.”
“That’s bullshit!”
“No it’s not.”
“Andy writes wonderful songs!”
“About murder.”
“Well at least his make senese!”
“What are you going on about?”
“What the hell is ‘On Any Other Day’ about?”
“Umm…it’s his birthday,” Kelsi said. Mary put on a fade of enlightenment, just as Sting, Andy and Stewart all walked through the door. Mary and Kelsi called out urgently to the other’s boyfriend. Stewart walked over to Mary, and Andy to Kelsi.
“Come here, you,” Mary said as she grabbed Stewart by the collar. She pulled his face down to hers. He looked a combination of scared and intrigued as she looked right into his eyes. She frowned when she saw that they were, indeed, green – not brown.
“Damn.” She said, and saw that Kelsi was trying to get Andy to stand back to back with her. When she finally did, she found that she was the sorter of the two.
“Damn,” she said and walked away. Mary looked forward to find that she was still holding onto Stewart’s collar.
“Oh, sorry,” she said and let him go.
“Would you ladies care to explain what just happened?” Stewart asked. They looked at each other, then back to him.
“No,” they said simultaneously, laughing. Stewart and Andy just shrugged and walked away.
“So, they’re green. You were right,” Mary said to Kelsi. She grinned smugly.
“Yeah, and you were right. Andy is taller than me.” The two sat in silence for a minute.
“You know what I noticed,” Mary said, “that close to Stewart’s face?”
“What?”
“Those lips are indeed something, or other.” The two girls laughed heartily as the boys watched from behind the kitchen door.
“There is something seriously off with those girls,” Sting said.
“Yeah, well at least our girlfriends laugh,” Stewart said.
“At least mine can sew.”
“Mary can sew!” Andy said defensively.
“Yeah, remember what happened to those pants she hemmed for me?”
“You did the fucking splits in them!”
“Yeah, well,” Sting fumbled, “Oh fuck it, I’m making a sandwich.”

Click Here to Read More..

Don't Give Up the Dye Job

Rating: PG-13


“Stewart, if you keep squirming, this peroxide is going to end up in your eyes,” Kelsi said and held Stewart’s face forward from behind. She had him in the kitchen chair, next to the sink, with an old sheet around his shoulders. He was joining his new band, The Police, and he needed to fix his dark brown hair. The rest of the boys in the band were blondes, and he needed to fit in with them.
“I’m sorry,” he said, turning to her, but she faced him back forward, “but it’s cold, and it tickles when people play with my hair.” Kelsi grabbed another clump of hair, put some foil under it, and applied the peroxide.
“Well, you’ll just have to get used to it, unless you like the pain of a stinging eye,” she said, folding the foil over. He made a noise in disagreement, and looked straight ahead. Ten minutes later, she had finished the whole back of his head, and moved onto the front. As she was leaning in to peroxide his bangs, stewart smiled at his view. She turned back around to get more foil, and Stewart reached up to surreptitiously slide off the last foil she did. It landed on the sheet, and Stewart let out an “oops”. Kelsi turned around to find the foil on the sheet and Stewart staring up at her innocently. She tisked and walked over to pick it up.
“Must have put too much peroxide in this one, and it slid out,” she said and put it back in his hair. She was leaning in right in front of his face, and he liked it. He was grinning like a fool, but forgot to stop smiling when she leaned back into a normal position.
“What are you grinning at?” she asked with her hands on her hips.
“…..Nothing…..” he said innocently, but she saw right through it.
“You bad boy,” she said, putting more peroxide in his hair. He could only continue smiling.
Twenty minutes later, Stewart was still in the chair, and Kelsi was sitting on the counter. She picked up the box and looked at the directions.
“Well, it says here that after twenty minutes it should be done,” she slid off the counter and walked over to him.
“It had better be done, we’re all out of peroxide,” he said and nudged to the bottle with his head. Kelsi nodded and started taking off the foil. She suddenly let out a gasp, and Stewart quickly turned around in his seat.
“What? What’s wrong?” Kelsi was holding her hand to her mouth, which was stuck in a mixture of surprise and amusement. She was laughing ever so quietly, buther body was jiggling with airy laughter.
“I don’t like knowing what’s going on,” Stewart said.
“See for yourself,” she said through giggles, and undid one of the foils in his bangs. The clump of hair dangled over his eyebrows, just within his view. He let out a gasp, and pulled it down further so he could fully see it. His hair had turned a bright shade of clownish orange.
“We must have needed more peroxide,” Kelsi said, undoing more foils, thus letting more of the carrot hued hair to make itself known. She couldn’t help but snicker a little; it looked rather funny.
“This is anything but funny,” he said, folding his arms across his chest.
“I’m sorry, it’s just that I’ve never seen someone with…orange hair.” She finished undoing all the foiled folds, and stood back in amazement at the sheer orangeness of his hair.
“Do you want to look in a mirror?” she asked him as she took the sheet off his shoulders.
“I guess I’ll have to at some time….” He said, standing up. They walked over to the bathroom and Kelsi opened the door. She lficked on the light, and Stewart stood in horror at the reflection in the mirror.
“I…I...I look like a fucking….carrot,” he emphasized the word “carrot” with disgust.
“Look, it will be ok for tonight, and in the morning we can go out and get you another bottle and fix this up.”
“We can’t.”
“Why not,” she asked, brushing the hair out of his face and putting her arms around his neck.
“Because I have to meet the guys tomorrow morning. We have to do an interview, a television interview. There’s no way I’m going on television looking like a fucking clown,” he was staring at himself angrily in the mirror. Kelsi reached up and kissed him lightly on the cheek.
“I’m sure we can work something out,” she said, trying to comfort him.
“What time is it?”
“I think it’s around ten.”
“Fuck. Everything’s closed.” He folded his armd in front of his chest.
“I’m sure it will be fine….” She was running out of comforting things to say to him. She couldn’t think of anything that would fix his hair tonight.
“Hey, if it’s a television show, they must have a hair stylistm right?”
“I guess so…Hey, I get where you’re going with this!” he turned to her and actually smiled. “The stylist can fix my hair that morning! You’re brilliant!” he picked her up and spun her around a few times. When he put her down, they smiled at each other, and he took her hand. They giggled their way up to the bedroom and shut the door.

------

“Oy mate, what the fuck happened to your hair?!” Kim exclaimed as Stewart walked into the studio. Sting turned around in his chair and burst out laughing. Tears were rolling down his face he was laughing so hard. Andy walked in shortly after, and repeated Sting’s exact reaction.
“It’s not that funny, guys,” Stewart said meekly.
“It bloody well is,” Sting said doubled over the arm of his chair. Stewart could only look around for the nearest hairstylist. Sensing his distress, the director of the television show came over to his side.
“You want that taken care of, skinny?” he asked, eyeing him up and down.
“The hair?”
“No, your nose; it’s hideous. Of course I mean your hair. Now, come with me and I’ll have Diane take care of you.” He whisked Stewart away to a make-up room and sat him down in the chair. Stewart explained to her what had happened, and she nodded thoughtfully.
“Ok,” she said in a think Spanish accent, “I know what to do.” Stewart sat back, and let her do what she had to do. Thirty minutes later, he was staring at a bleached blonde version of himself in the mirror. No more orange.
“Oh wow,” he said, running his hands through his hair, “how could I ever thank you?” she smiled and shook her head.
“It my job, you no need to thank me.” She smiled at him, and he was quickly dragged away by the producer.
“We go live in fifteen Stewey baby. Let’s get you on the set.” Before he could say another word, he was pushed into a fluffy chair on the set of a morning talk show with Sting to his left and Andy to his right.
“Wow, I like what she did to your hair,” Andy said.
“Yeah, not so Bozo-ish anymore,” Sting said laughing.
“Oh can it, shmuck-o.”

Click Here to Read More..