Looking For Someone - Pt 1

Rating: PG-13 for some language and sexuendos.
Summary: You meet the guys in Genesis at a record party, and general chaos insues.


I



“Neil, please, I’ll be fine.” I said as I pulled away from my brother. He sighed and opened the door for me and his girlfriend Anna. We all walked into the huge hall and were instantly flooded by bright lights and the occasional photographer flash. Ah yes, the annual Charisma Records party. And there, standing looking like the Charisma label himself, was Tony Straton-Smith with a silver plate of cheese.

“Just as I expected guv’nor,” My brother Neil (Yes, THE Neil Innes) joked and took a few cubes. “This is my lovely girlfriend Anna and my sister Layla,” he introduced and Tony kissed both our hands. He offered me a cheese-cube and I took it hungrily. I only had a salad for dinner since my own brother forgot I was vegan and took us to a fish and chip place.

“Hey,” I said to Neil, “I’ll find you later. I’m gunna go look around.”

“No way. You stay next to me. Just imagine what mum would say if she knew I let you off on your own in this place,” he sternly objected. I started to plead but Tony interjected.

“Hey, chill man. It’s not like she’s gunna get abducted. The worst thing that’ll happen is she’ll get knocked-up.”

“yeah, that’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” Neil said and shook his head. “Fine, go ahead. I just better be able to find you later,” he sighed. I hugged and thanked him and walked away. But, not before taking another piece of cheese followed by Tony’s laugh of approval.



II



I walked around the ballroom for at least a half an hour. I was mainly working the perimeter (where all the food and drinks were), and I didn’t see anyone I knew – or I would like to know. I aimlessly made my way around the dessert table for the third time (but only the first time eating), when I literally bumped into someone. I looked up and found I was face to face (well, more like face to chest) with Mike Rutherford. Thankfully his cake was still on his plate. I smiled up at him and he smiled down at me.

“Hey, I know who you are. I’m a very big fan,” I said and took a bite of a raspberry tart on my plate.

“Thanks,” he replied and then looked like he was trying to scan his brain for something. He suddenly frowned, “Erm, I’m sorry about this, but, umm, do I know you from somewhere?”

I laughed and patted his forearm, which I think I saw him blush a little over. “Probably not, so don’t worry your pretty little head about it. I’m Layla Innes, Neil’s sister.”

“Oh, right the funny piano guy from the Bonzo band, right?”

“Yup. That would be the one.”

“Well,” he said in-between bites of cake, “I’m gunna head back to the rest of the guys, you know, Genesis, and I was wondering if you wanted to tag along too?”

I grinned, “I’d love to. But first, I feel the call of another raspberry tart.”



III



“Hey, where’s my cake?” called an apparently hungry Phil Colins as soon as we approached. Mike just shrugged his shoulders and ate the last bite of his piece.

“Hey, she’s got raspberry tart though!” I looked up and saw Steve Hackett grinning through his full beard. I just laughed and followed Mike, biting into my last piece. The whole band laughed.

“So, who’s the bird, I mean chick, I mean lady,” fumbled Peter Gabriel and started blushing. I chuckled a little; he was quite adorable when he was confused. I know that sounds mean, but it’s true.

“It’s ok,” I said and wiped away the crumbs from my mouth. “I’m Layla Innes, Neil’s sister.”

“The funny piano guy from the Bonzo band, right?” asked Phil suddenly reappearing with a piece of cake. Mike and I looked at eachother and laughed.

“Yea, that’s right.”

“Well nice to meet you,” Steve said and held out his hand.

“Likewise,” I said as I shook his hand. He had rather nice hands, and I tried not to giggle out loud. I shook the hands of the rest of the band and we started talking about out music (go figure).

“Well I play bass, I have been for six years,” I said and my comment was met with open mouths.

“A bird who plays bass? Oh, sorry I mean chick. No wait, lady,” Peter fumbled through again. I put my hands on his shoulders and turned him to face me. I looked right into his blue eyes.

“Look,” I said after repressing all my giggles, “it doesn’t matter. You can call me anything, except ‘woman’, ‘bitch’, or any synonym of ‘whore’. Really, I don’t care.”

“Oh, well that’s good,” he said and gave me an Eskimo kiss. I patted his head and turned away.

“Where the bloody hell is Tony?” Mike asked and looked around. The rest of the band shrugged their shoulders.

“Let’s look!” Phil said. After a few minutes, no one could see anything.

“I have an idea!” Phil said and tapped Mike on the shoulders. Mike looked down at him and Phil made a motion for Mike to kneel. He sighed, but did so. The rest of the band looked on puzzled. Phil got on Mike’s shoulders and Mike stood up shakily. Phil now towered above the whole party and could see everything.

“I don’t see him,” Phil said scanning the room. “Turn to your left a bit,” phil said and again, Mike did what he said. As they repeated this little periscope bit, I saw none other than the aforementioned Tony Banks approaching to their rear.

“Guys, erm, I think you can stop now,” I said.

“No! this is too much fun!” Phil said and patted Mike’s head.

“But, really -” I said but was cut off by the silencing finger of Phil.

“Wait, I think I see him!” he proclaimed. His little victory dance was soon shut off. Tony, walking up behind them, was cleaning his teeth with a nice, sharp, toothpick. Once he spotted Phil’s arse a little above eye-level, an evil grin came upon his face. He removed the toothpick from his mouth, and promptly stabbed Phil in the behind with it.



IV



“Oy mate! Who does that, honestly?” Phil said once placed somewhat gracefully on the floor.

“Apparently Tony does,” quipped Steve. He pushed up his glasses with one finger, satisfied with his comment.

“Apparently...” Peter said and looked from me to Tony, then back again. Tony looked up from his toothpick (which he never put back in his mouth, by the way) and saw me for the first time. His eyes lit up a little and he smiled. Naturally, I smiled back. I mean, I always had a sort of celebrity crush on him, but I was actually meeting him. He was a lot more handsome up close.

“Hi, I’m Tony Banks, as I assume you already know,” he said quite smoothly. I fumbled through my next couple statements.

“Erm, well, yes, I already knew that since I’m a huge fan. Oh, and well I was just standing here just now as they were looking for you. And erm, well, umm, yeah,” I said and chuckled. I looked up, suddenly realising that probably no one just understood what I said. Peter walked to my back and started massaging my shoulders.

“Jeez, usually it’s Steve that makes the birds go all jiggly at the tongue.”

“Ooer,” I said and raised my eyebrows. The whole group laughed and I felt a little better. Peter was still massaging my shoulders.

“Now, lets try that again, eh?” Peter said.

“Well, ok, why not?” I said and smiled at Tony. He grinned back and reached over and took my hand.

“Yes, I know who you are, I’m a big fan. And my name is Layla, Layla Innes,” my voice cracked when I reached the end because he started rubbing my hand between his fingers. He smiled and Phil said, “Ok, now you guys are just being mean.”

“Well if that’s being mean,” I said, “Please, be very, very nice to me.”

Everyone laughed and Tony looked right into my eyes. I smiled as Peter let go of my shoulders and I rolled them back and forth for a bit. Suddenly, I felt a tugging on my shoulder and I was spun around. It was Neil.



V



“I saw everything. Don’t even try to explain, it won’t matter,” he said sternly. I looked back at him equally sternly.

“...and what’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re too young to be involved in that sort of stuff. Now come on, we’re going home. Seems the Halibut did a bit of damage with Anna’s stomach.”

“Well, you did eat meat. Hey, wait. First, I’m 19, in university, and I think I’m old enough to make decisions on my own. Second, you can leave, but I’m staying. I can get a ride or walk the 50 feet to the hotel.” I stood with my arms folded, just daring Neil to defy me as he sighed.

“Fine, you’re right. You’re no longer a child, do what you want,” he said with his head bowed down. For a minute, I almost felt some remorse.

“But I swear to god,” he said, suddenly louder, “if anything happens to you, it’s not my problem. You get raped or something, it’s your own damn fault. Good bye, see you at home hopefully by tomorrow,” and he left.

I turned back to the guys and they were just standing there in awe. Mike was the first one to speak.

“Is he always like that?”

“Only to me; I guess it’s just the little sister syndrome. He tried flushing me down the toilet when I was first born.”

“Thank god you survived,” Tony said. I turned and smiled at him. Suddenly Phil butted in, “Cor, I’m starving. You lot wanna go somewhere else to eat?”



VI



“A van? You expect all six of us to fit in this little van?” I asked when we got to the car park.

“Well, Peter’s driving, there’s one seat up front, which leaves four of us to fit into.....three seats. Oh yeah I see what you mean,” Steve said.

“Well, since I’m the tallest one,” Mike started to say.

“Go on, get the front...” I said and looked at him sarcastically before punching him playfully in the arm.

“Well,” Tony said standing beside me, “we could always share a seat love.” He put his arm around me, and we just looked at each other for what seemed like and eternity before Phil interrupted us.

“Really, we can just pull out the back row so you two can cuddle or whatever it is your hormones are currently screaming.”

“Phil,” Steve warned, “don’t give them any ideas.”

“Are we going or what?” Peter asked, already sitting in the driver’s seat. He started the van, which emanated a loud bang, and we all jumped. As previously planned, I was put on Tony's lap next to Steve and the window. That ride could have lasted forever.



VII



“Five cheeseburgers, six Cokes, one Diet, six medium fries,and two apple pies” Peter said into the mouth of Ronald McDonald. We drove around to the window, waited about five minutes, then our food was delivered. Mike dished out the bags and Peter pulled away. When I opened my bad, I noticed that not only did I have my burger and fries, but there was a container of onion rings and an Apple Pie.

"Hey, I got a ton of extra food!" I said smiling. Everyone protested, making sure that they all had the food they were supposed to. When they all realized that everything was as it should, they began complaining about my free food.

"Hey, I know, let's play a game to figure out who will get the extra food. I know that there's no way I can eat all of this," I said stuffing a french fry into my mouth.

“No fair, Tony’s gunna win no matter what!” Phil said.

“No, really, lets play. I’ll ask you guys something about me, you lot can guess and whoever gets it right gets the food.”

“Seems fair,” Peter said as he narrowly missed hitting a bright orange barricade with the van.

“Ok....” I thought of a question. This was very hard as Tony had just begun to rub my back, preoccupying my mind. “I got one. When’s my birthday? The closest one gets the food.”

“September 18,” guessed Steve.

“May 7,” said Mike.

“August 21,” said Tony.

“August 22,” said Phil, apparently trying some strategy. Or he wasn’t paying attention.

“Well, I’ll go with February 13,” said Peter.

“Isn’t that your birthday?” puzzled Mike.

“Well,” blushed Peter, “you never know.”

“Pssh, singers,” said Steve and poked Peter in the back of his head.

“Well, who gets the extra stuff?” asked Mike while taking a big slurp from his soda.

“Tony does actually,” I said to a van full of groans.

“Told you he’d win...”

“Oh shut up.”



VIII



“So, where to now?” I asked as I bit into my burger. We were parked in the neighbouring car park to McDonalds. Everyone was digging into their food, not talking. Tony had been nice enough to share his onion rings with everyone. Meanwhile, my lap was serving as a table for Tony’s winning apple pie, and his other food, too.

“I dunno,” said Peter in between mouthfuls, “Not much is open at this time of night.”

“Oh, I beg to differ...” Steve said and wiggled his eyebrows underneath his glasses. The van erupted in various sighs of “steve....” and “Go figure....” and the occasional “One-track mind...”

“I didn’t mean that you filthy little perverts!”

“Hey, don’t say that to all of us. I mean, there’s definitely only one of us with the intentions of getting into Tony’s pants,” Phil said.

“So?” I asked accidentally out loud. Everyone stopped eating and just turned to look at Tony and me.

“Anyway....where to next?” Tony asked blushing, trying to change the subject.

“Well definitely not ‘back to your place’. Sorry Layla,” Peter said and started the van up. I grunted and ate the rest of my fries.



IX



“Where the hell are we?” I asked as I looked around this new place. In front of us loomed a huge stone castle built on a sprawling, lush, green field.

“It’s some random castle. I remember going here for tours when I was little. It’s so different when it’s night-time,” Steve said and folded his arms.

“It’s also quite different when it’s ILLEGAL,” I emphasized.

“Oh come on, where’s your backbone?” Mike asked.

“Here,” I pointed at my back, “wanna see?”

“No really, I think we’ll pass,” Phil said.

“I agree with Layla. I don’t think we should be doing this,” Tony said and looked around the property. The gate was completely opened and there was no one around.

“Fine then,” Steve said, “you two can go off and make out in the van and we’ll go explore.” Tony and I looked at each other for a few seconds, looked at the van, and trotted off in its general direction.

“See you lot later,” I called. Tony turned around and walked a few steps back to the guys.

“Hey, if there’s a tie on the handle, knock first.”

“You don’t own a tie,” Phil said.

“Well, I think you’ll be able to tell,” he said and strolled back towards me. However, when we reached the van the doors were locked and the key was in the ignition. We headed back to the guys who were just starting to amble towards the castle.

“What’s wrong? Not posh enough for you?” Peter said sarcastically.

“No you idiot,” I said right in his face, “you left the bloody keys in the ignition with the door locked!” I hit Peter in the middle of the forehead mildly hard.

“See? It’s a sign; you have to come with us now.”

“What about your keys?”

“We’ll get them later. I’ll have Tony S. come up with a coat hanger later.”

“Right then....are you really going in the castle?”

“Of course!” Mike peeked in between Phil and Peter’s head, pumping his fist in the air, “let’s go!”



X



“Tonight, the headline news: Rock group Genesis arrested for breaking and entering into decrepit old castle,” I said sarcastically as we walked over the dried-up moat.

“Oh shut up. It’ll be fun,” Phil said and pretended to push me into the moat. As usual, I lost my balance and fell the three feet into the dirt.

“Don’t worry, I’ll save you!” Tony joked and jumped into the dirt.

“No Tony! You can't swim!” Mike yelled and jumped down also.

“I’ll save all of you!” Peter said. He daintily sat down on the draw-bridge and slid into the empty moat.

“I’m drowning you pansy!” Steve yelled and flopped around in the dirt. Mike grabbed hold of him around the waist and dragged him to the “shore”. Once on “dry land”, Mike proclaimed, “Oh no, he’s stopped breathing! I must perform CPR!”

“Aah, no way! I can breathe just fine now, trust me,” Steve said and got up, brushing himself off.

“Well now that that’s over with,” Tony said walking up the moat, “let’s just go inside. I mean, we’re already here let’s see if there’s anyone around; namely a police officer.”

“Good idea,” Mike said and raising his arm, again, he yelled “CHARGE!!!” and ran into the castle.

“Wait!” I said looking around panicked, “Where’s Phil?”